New Year's Resolutions

At this time of the year, every commercial, magazine and half ofTwitter is obsessed with “New Year, New Me.” While the intention behind this topic may be noble, it sends themessage that we aren’tactually good enough as we are. For people struggling with eating disorders,this can be particularly poisonous, as it reinforces restriction andoverexercising while stigmatizing those who live in larger bodies. Byinsinuating that we need to change the way we are right now, this overlooks ouraccomplishments - whether that be over the past year or over the course of ourlifetimes - and devalues the very traits that make us who we are. Maybe thisyear, you relied on resilience to overcome loss, depression, or trauma - does “newyear, new me” mean you should shirk the characteristic that has actuallyempowered you and strongly informed your daily life? Or maybe this year, youactually cut back on exercising because you realized it was being used tocompensate for what you were eating and was developing into a maladaptivepattern of behavior. Does “new year, new me” recognize the strength it took to notonly build awareness around this behavior but then to actually change it?

I like to think of resolutions as something that builds offqualities you already possess or experiences you have already had. If you spent2019 advocating for others, make 2020 about advocating for yourself. If 2019meant a new job with longer hours and less time for pursuing your passions,make 2020 about taking a pause to do something for yourself again. If 2019meant changes in relationships, make 2020 about establishing new connectionsand reinvigorating old ones. If 2019 feels like a year you’d like to forget, make 2020 a year about processing whatmade it difficult with a trained professional and figuring out how to make thisyear different.

Resolutions should be used to reflect on the past and makechanges that are more in line with your values. Over the next few weeks, thinkabout your strengths and accomplishments and how you can accentuate them evenmore in 2020 and who will be by your side as you do so. Remember: you don’thave to do this alone.

Kate Burns is a therapist with Empowering You, specializing in eating disorders. She is currently running an outpatient group to support women with eating disorders. Please contact us today if interested in support